Beautiful

Who knows whats the definition of beautiful ? No one really knows anyway , it is you , yourself who created it . Everybody different in their own way , like my barbies .  I love my barbies , they are beautiful even my Kens . They are not the most handsome guy in the world but so ? At least they treat us as a really true friend , all the problems we solve together , happiness we been through together . Its the memories that makes a person beautiful . I dont really get it why some people say '' makeup are fake'' and then when their friend puts on make up and post on Facebook or twitter , you will go like and comment ''Chiobu worh'' Chiobu means the eyes know how to attract guys if you know . Those people who put on make up ? They put on for ? Due to society . Everybody judge , including me . I judge sometimes too . If i hate the person , i mean like who wont ? But you dont have to say it out face to face or even comment right ? LOL . CONCLUSION 2012 SUCKS . 

2012 sucks .

Guess what ? 2012 really sucks . It does , firstly him . Secondly friends problem, which is just the starting of 2012 . LIKE JUST FREAKING THREE MONTHS pass , everything destroyed . D E S T R O Y E D . Isnt it saddening seeing your friends changing to worse to prove someone else wrong ? Why must you prove that your not a stupid nerd ? Believe in yourself , stay as yourself . Cause everybody really beautiful in their own way , without makeup , faking . Stop acting , change back to who you were alright . I hope your reading this , because im utterly disappointed at you . YES YOU .

HAPPY BIRTHDAY !

Happy birthday jo ! :D shypudding ! We love you ! #stayhappyandyoungforever ! #happygirl98 ! Hope you enjoyed everything we did for you , although it wasnt much and cant really play as it was late and your need to go . :/ Next time during june stay over ! :D we watch horror movies at night , than partyyyy ! Hope you enjoy this precious moments ! :D .

Barbie Big Day

TODAYY IS 29 MARCHHH ! :D Barbie , jojo_sweetalkXD or ROLLMAO had her birthday ! CAKE SMASH , swimming true or dare . Awesome , love you baby ! . Beens long since we played together till so long as your live far :/ But too bad one of our Ken cant join us :( Enjoy the present okayy ! :D . WE LOVE BARBIE JO . XD , and had fun heart to heart talk with felicia baby and shermaine baby . :') , how disappointed we are at you . You understand ? Please dont change to be like her , change back to whom we know last year .

Hey i just met you , and this jelly , but here my moustache love me maybe ?

JI CUTE YI SIA ! :D Me loving ittt !

does anyone love jellybean ? I DO ! See my cute moustachi jellybean wallet !
Hey i just met you , and this jelly , but here my moustache  love me maybe ? 
Spent like almost most of the time drawing it on my orange jelly wallet ! Be nutella ! Cuse jelly is for me !

BEEN LONG

Been long since i was really happy anyway , tmr a bigg day ! Its JOJO birthday ! @Jojo_swetalkXD ! Follow this awesome shit girl at twitter alright ? And I HOPE SHE LOVE HER SURPRISES TMR ! Going to play till real late , actually i hope we could have stay at Syin Mao house , but yeah . Its hard . :/ maybe some other days ? LETS PRAY . :D . Tmr going to be a happy day ! FLIMING CELBRATING AND PARTYING LIKE NO ONE ELSE DID . :D . BARBIE AND KENS RULE !

human changes because ? TRUST .

 Did you even wonder why i manage to change my attitude to worse ? And who made me into this shit ? It was you . I didnt have much parental love , my parents were all busy . They dont have time for me , you were the only one . I told you i trusted you with my whole heart , i didnt lie . I trusted you to not leave me . That was the first time i ever trusted a person with my whole heart , and it will be the last time . I trusted you to protect me , i depended on you . Guess what ? You left .  You didnt change yeah so ? It doesnt matters . You left ,  it told me to be stronger , it told me to protect myself . Its the only way i wont get hurt , because no one will ever be there to protect me if i needed . If i didnt trust you i wont get hurt .

Young and free .

I used to regret why i didnt just chilled and relax and stop pretending like im adult when i was young . I didnt get much freedom back then , but at least things were simple . I had friends i could play with , and all my worries will be what i am going to eat , why school exist , what am i wearing , is my hair nice ? I mean like , you know when i was young i was more wild , and really back than i was sikple , i didnt know vulgars except stupid . I didnt know about what doesn fuck you means  , i was really pure back than . I didnt expect life to be so complicated since i when P5 though , till now its still complicated . To be honest i had my first boyfriend when i was P5 , dont feel like exposing who but yeah . His now is Sports Sec Schools 14 . I forget his birthday so dont ask me . We were in rs for in like 1 month ? We break up in a really cool method . I dont feel like exposing this , but if you wanna know text me . Hhahaha , my barbies and kens know . :3 . Until P6 i guess started to hate him , and talk to him and love him . We were so much better back then before things get so complicated . We used to be so close , you would hold me tight . Hold my hands in between your finger gaps , hug me when i cry , kiss me when im sad . Arguements happen all the times but was solve all along , but now ?

Im just protecting myself .

Today was a nightmare , you wore a bright red t-shirt . Well , everything sucks this whole day . I dont use to argue and talkback to teachers you should know that well , until one day i realize why should i stand there like a idoit and get scolded when i did nothing wrong ? No one going to know what i did and just misunderstands me no one will be there to protect me . In this life no one will defend you , so imma just defend myself . By arguing back its just one of the ways im protecting myself to get hurt . So dont blame me if i argue cause im just trying to protect my love ones and me .

unreasonable

I mean like some people just so unreasonable , your firstly said IT WAS SETTLE , than your suddenly come and threaten again . LOL , i mean like #youseriousbro? <-- And i dont get how can EGG just stand there and watch Solution get push to the wall . STUPID EGG at least try to stand beside him or push him away ?  Anyway had a fun time making pizza with barbies @FeLiCiATaNN house ! aka syinmaoo . :D . PIZZA FAILURE . All taste like bread more . HAHAHAAHA , and a fun time ehem ehem at cwp ! . And saw my primary school friend Andra ! How much i miss her . :) Live back then was so much simpler . I really wish to go back and didnt start anything and enjoy life . Probably we would be less hurt ? Everyone would go different ways , and probably i wont need you to be by my side . But what if we were meant to be ? Well , hmm . '' things that are meant to be yours will be yours'' so yeah . OKAYY , back to doing ehem ehem . COUGHS .

You've change , you learn to be stronger .

Im sorry for every single fucking shit i did to hurt you . I didnt know it really hurt that much until something happen today and im just going to keep it in my heart . I know if i had love you enough i would have change and really stop talking to them . Why didnt i change ? And only regret this fucking shit now . I finally understand why someone says do your best for the person you love so you wont regret . Now everythings too late , he changes and his too hurt to even care about this . You know how disappointed it is to hear from you that you aint going to care anymore . You've change , you learn to be stronger . Thankyou for loving me with all your heart . Im sorry for hurting you so deep that there will always be a scar that wont be gone .

Homesweethome

What a terrible day . HAHAHAhaha , just kidding . Today one of our barbies didnt come , so didnt flim . HOPE SHE GET WELL SOON OKAY PEOPLE ?! Help us pray tmr she will be in school ! We will be fliming with one of my Kens DSLR XD . We got professional people going to help us flim worhh . HOPE JEDREK can help us flim , his better with fliming you see , his infor com . :D . SO HOPE EVERYBODY HERE AND yeah , pray and work ! . Anyway BIG NEWS , MRS YEO MOP THE FLOOR . HAHAHAHHAAHHAHAA  .

one more chance to hold you close ?

i dont know where your going , or when your coming home . If we really #youknowiknow and #people know there'll be world war three . But whatever , becuase tonight we are young .  xD kidding im forever young IN HEART . #happyyounginheart98 tmr going to see my barbies , didnt know we only hang out together since FIRST OF MARCH ONLY . See how awesome we been ? I cant wait to see them tmr and i still freaking hate my big red pimple on my freaking nose .

BARBIES AND KENS ARE KIND HEARTED .

Barbies and Kens watching Charity show , and most of us donated . HHAHAHAHA , how kind right . :D than Y MY PIMPLE NO GO AWAY . Okay sadlife i have . IDC liao luh , pimple pimple luh . KNN , hahhaahaha XD

REDNOSE

why my pimple always choose to be on my nose , i mean like no other places ? lol . #irritated . AND WORST OF ALL , it just burst . sibei pain . KNN , hahahaha . RED NOSE NO CUTE OKAY , LIKE CLOWN LIKE THAT . Sibei unglam siah , but whatever luh . TMR STILL got school no matter i have pimple a not . SO SAD LIFE ALRIGHT . # i hate pimples , i mean like a small one not on my nose still can . ON MY NOSE ? AGAIN?

Rain , perfect weather for ?

So its raining , its perfect for sleeping i guess . Forget to bring my file back , kns . No need do math and geo homework anymore . Going to work on art soon , and I just started reading a book for a book review . OKAY , weirdo . SUNDAY READING A BOOK #SERIOUSLYUH ? yeah , i am serious . Smelling my cute blanket , did i introduce my blanket ? Its name is call BLANKET . hahah , lame . I didnt really give it a name though , its squarish and black like a nigga it was born when i was born . 240298 . :D . Its smells nice , well it have my smells you know right . :D . i hugged it every night to sleep . Be nutella . XD .

Solution Part Two .

Since it was requested by my BABRIES and one KEN . I will blog about it sonner or later again , but now just some random shot of himself . What his brother send us , ''zilian'' picture ! ENJOYY! 

i HAVE NO FREAKING IDEA WHAT HE WAS thinking during this , so dont ask me . His one of my Kens , who have freaking too much fats . Okay kidding . He has a twitter fb too ! And a youtube video of how well he sings and shakes head so do visit this links . 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1AZRjep4WyA&feature=g-all-u&context=G22fdae2FAAAAAAAAEAA <-- how well he sings ! 

And our ABUDEN video which is somewhere around some of my post ! Do go look and likfe sub too ! :D EnJoy !

Swag

Anyway , one of my barbies had made her blog too ! Guess who ?! DRUMROLLL , ITSSSSSS , SHERMAINE ! Duhh ,  http://barbiesandkens-xuanmao.blogspot.com/ Go check out yo , :D woo hahaha , EH , YOUR VERY BAD HORH , read my blog dont follow me :( . SAD LIFE . FOLLOW ME OKAYY . :D ON BLOG AND TWITTER ! And do stay tuned to this two blog and our Facebook Youtube and Twitter for our HAVENT COME OUT videoo ! :D

WhatACuteDay

Morning People ! Or stalkers ! cant believe my saturday just pass without doing much , JUST PERFORM, SHOP, LAUGH LIKE MAD LADY JUST RELEASE FROM IMH on mrt with Barbiesss ! Anyway my barbiesandkens and planning on another video soon , so stay tuned alrights . Should be tmr afternoon me or one of my BarbiesAndKens to upload . :D Than i send you the link ! But for know if you still havent watch our sibei lame video this is the LINK . http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRB18-qGSv8&feature=related

Useless human.

What can I do other than crying every night. Looking through our memories left. Really ? All arguements left. "you okay?" if I said I was fine what will you do ? I'll be lying. No Im not okay , never really okay for every night. Especially tonight. I don't even dare to open your msg now. What could I do if I open them up ? More tears I guess.

Expectation kills human.

How do we kill expectations ? Everynight I been waiting for some miracle to happen , daydreaming too much. No way his not coming back to you , give up girl. Why do humans build expectation when they know they might get disappointment. I guess it's because human love people too easily and forgets that you ain't suppose to have any expectation of him/her after breakup you know. Life sucks to pretend. I don't get how can some girls tolerate and pretend and hide their crush. I will burst it out , yes. I don't hate him , instead it's the opposite . I do love him. What a sad life I have right ? Ilovehim , hehatesme. Thank god I have barbies.

Headache sucks. Leg cramp , toe nail break . Kns , sibei pain . Remember last time when if I msg you this stuff , you would be like "you okay baby?" now ? I don't think you will give a fuck if I break my leg anymore. Slaps back to reality , stop day dreaming. It just makes you have disappointment. I really want to text to see whether you look at my blog though. But I guess you don't , and I would sound irritating to you. You seems irritated now or is it me ? Whatever luh , I don't want ask anymore. Why must I fall in love with him , why must they be more friends. Why do I want you back so much everyday. Everything just sucks. Sucks sucks sucks.

I don't know what happen to you guys uh seriously. I can't be bother with my phone , all those bullshit. Firstly what innocent than no what thing settle. #siao what deleted why deleted when deleted ? Idontkmow anything luh , every time about you guys give me big headache. I rather blog than go and see all this problems coming up though , his replied say all settle , PHEW , non of my business anymore. :D headache sucks. kns , i think I day dream too much. well , since reality cmi , daydreams are my things to do. If I dont I think i would go crazy.

I love to daydream , i mean when no ones around or in class or before bed . Its fun you know , since in reality you cant do much , daydreaming about anything or everything . I laugh randomly when i daydream about you or barbies and kens , i frustrate when i daydream about those msg . I daydream really about anything , even those music mv . I tend to think too much .

People change and you change . Why must you be a ''people'' .

그건 나에게로 엿같아, 난 당신이 날 사랑 가시오 아직 당신을 사랑 해요. 난 당신을 돌려 받고 싶은 그런데도 당신은 날 원하지 않는다. 인생은 엉망. 난 그저 당신과 대화를 계속해서 당신을 꾸짖으했다, 난 그것이 끝내고 싶어 없다. 당신이 날 사랑하고 날 다시 원하는, 당신은 내가 당신에게 태도를 보여주라고하는 것보다, 이후 내가 언제 그런 거죠? 말했다 보다 원하는 없다. 당신은 어떻게 생각하세요? 당신은 내가 돌아올 원하는, 당신은 내가 사라집니다 싶지 않아요.  Idontknow whether correctly translate alright :D . PEACE .

只有这样，我可以发泄我对你的感情。 你说你对我还是有一点感情，但是为什么你的字永远都这么冷淡。 我像是一个大傻瓜吗，被你这样玩弄？ 你根本都不懂我在生气什么。never mind , 你根本就不管。别在骗我了，我不在时那大傻瓜了。我还是会在这里默默地想你，把你藏在心理。把我们之间的回忆一点点的，写下来。

Nothing near to happines

I don't hate you and I never will , I just act like I do because it's easier rather than admitting that I miss you .I don't know what to say to you anymore , whatever I say seems to annoy you and myself more with your replies. 'lol, okay.' speechless ? I guess so. You said you are happier of with your friends without me , than later no. 'it just makes me angry ' wth. At least you hate me , I mean like a feeling. What about me ? I love you so much that I just can't hate you . Its like I need to hate you , but I just love you . 有时我真希望你还是我的，但是你跟你的朋友比跟我还开心。 我这么能要回你呢。我根本就不配你。我们有始终根本就不该开始。

Chapterthree: BarbiesAndKens big day and video !

Back from performaing with BarbiesAndKens ! Love today ttm ! Performing time was awesome , after that even awesome , eat play laugh in mrt like siao . Take video too! Wait I upload to

youtube show you guys ! :D . 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRB18-qGSv8 link for our first ABUDEN , sorry quailty baddd uh :# but hope you enjoy it ! . 

Its awesome shit rights ?! Barbies and kens forever !

Some more random photos of Barbies and Kens today ! 

Tmr having a performance ! Kind of excited though XD , I'm not going to care about those shits anymore. :3 Anyway there this girl I like to introduceeeeee you peeps !

She is a awesome senior you can find , she encourage me to study , she cheer me up when I'm sad. She's there when I need her at least :D Follow her on twitter @NKimKee ! #Cutesenior !

i miss the times that we almost shared , i miss the love that was almost there , i miss the times when we used to kiss . At least in my dreams just let me take my time and reminisce . I miss the times that we never had . What happen to us we were almost there . Who ever said its impossible to miss what you never had , never almost had you .

these rings were meant to be forever together , now their separated . They used to be my favourite things to do , just looking at it makes me happy , now looking at it just brings me tears . I love you , so what . Im saying it now , im tired of holding on and pretending i dont . I love you , i want you . Will you still be mine ? NO , not in my future . Your a song , i been searching for my life , but im not the melody to your life .

i wanted you back so much . What was your reply ? 'lol , k . bye'' . '' i dont want to get hurt anymore'' You think i dont get hurt when you say that ? You know how much tears did i drop ? No, you dont know a single thing about me . You change , you move on . You became who you promised not to be , just like my father . He hurt me physically , you hurt me in both . Just with your words is enough to kill me , what more .

Just as our relationship was worse , one of my ken have to step in and make it worser and one of your asshole friend had come to act like a dog . #youseriousaboutthis . Spoiling my friends reputation is as though spoiling mine , i dont care who the fuck you are . You dont have the rights to scold them . I scold them , not you . so -l- you dog . Just a follower behind him .

Grab somebody sexy tell them hey ! #startstoshakehead . SEXY RIGHTTTTTT . WATCH IT ! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1AZRjep4WyA&feature=my_liked_videos&list=LLMINUXs_XvKrBume_IOIO7g

ABC .

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTVWXYZ . whats missing ? hmm , U .
why does your attitude changes so fast ? .. In one moment , you were really sweet . Another moment ''kwhatever.Bye'' . 你知道有多痛吗．everyday i think why . I daydream about u , i sweetdream about u , i tweet about u and now i write about u . Guess what ? Im still not over u . You moved on , i dont know what to do . No one knows how i deal with the stuff you gave me , i threw and suddenly when to search for it . Not blaming you , just blaming myself . Why cant i just let go and move on like how you did . Why does my heart aches when i see you walking by . Why does it hurts to reread our old conversations . Today , i went to the ''castle'' sitting down remembering memories , i'm going to keep them deep in my heart , someplace i wont forget but wont remember everyday .

Solution :D

''我想念你时,你有没有在想我呢? 我真的很希望有,但这个希望是不可能 dream come true.'' Only through this way , you wont understand . What i feel , and seeing how coward im to you now . I hope you aint reading my blog , just incase you get angry and #youknowiknowcanalready . Anyways , really tired . Tired of bullshitting around you . Saying i dont care , when i do . I DO OKAY . I DO .. Anyways , i was really touch by one of my Ken msg when after reading finish my blog . :') smilee . Thanks fatpork  who text me . ''need heart to heart talk call me okay ? Or i call you '' me SIBEI TOUCH . ''Hahahah :3 bhb me no need Heart to Heart talk yett . '' Thanks stupid pork . 

SEEE , YOU FAMOUS LIAO LORH . HAHAHAHAHAH , GOT YOUR FACE IN MY SWAG BLOG . 

. 

Chapter two: No Kens , just cute Barbies . XD

Just another extra Pictures of Barbies ! :D . Since my barbies want it . Look at our pedo geeks.  :D #PedoGirlsRock .

Was took today right at one of barbies house ; XuanMao house . Well , Shermaine's houseee .

Stalking us ? @Twitter alright :D .
Hey i just met you and this crazy but here my face , so stalk me maybe ? :3

BarbiesAndKens ChapterOne : '' Barbies getting wet , Kens to the rescue ''

Barbies and Kens first Family photo !

With another awesome girl , aka Gloria . :D . 

Sorry swaggers to keep you waiting longlong for my pictures ! :D Well , this is BarbiesAndKens ChapterOne : '' Barbies getting wet , Kens to the rescue '' Well they didnt rescue us of course , just title .

I always wonder whether he sees this , i mean like yo you see this ? I dont think he did , well sighs . Like this also better , me and him separated for nearly one month . I mean like after tmr will be officially one month . Weird isnt it ? Been together for 1 year 7 months , and this is the result . Cried and cried and guess what , no one really cares . No one will know how hard is it . All this memories , you really think i could hate you ? No , i cant .  Tears falls like how rain drips . Too emotional right ? Or left ? Sighss , my barbies and kens are always trying to get me know someone else , but it really doesnt help . Sorry to say this but yeah 他对我的态度也变了, 我永远都不会习惯. 我也不想习惯.

Its kind of a HappyDay today with my BarbiesAndKens , except for the morning assembly period time . Kns , get into the monitering program every day need to let parents and Miss Mar sign . I mean like , wth im not that free you know ? One week i still can take it , two weeks ? #youserious . Back to Barbies and Kens , today was fun ttm . Played water dance around under the hot sun . :D . Im still waiting for the photos to be send to me than I upload again okayyss ? :D . For now enjoy this , 

#NerdGirls98 CUTE A NOT ? 

Barbie and kens

Barbies and Kens are awesome , we party , we laugh . We get crazy , so if you wanna have fun we are the best choice . We dont club not ahlian or ahbengs , just some typical teenagers who have swag . XD Be jelly of us ! We LOVE to dance , thats our passion . Studys hmm , shouldent say much about that . They accompany through cries , happiness and tons of scolding . Oh yeah , forget introduce them and me . 

Agnes Chan Ting , aka Tingmao or OrangeStop . Love life complicated , follow at @OrangeStopA 

Jojo Er Jia Rou , aka Roumao . One of my barbies ! :D .  #prettygirlrock . Follow her on twitter @Jojo_sweetalkXD She HYPER ABOUT EVERYTHING . 

Felicia Tan Syin Yi , aka SyinMao . #laughinggirlrock She loves to laugh about EVERYTHING , LITERALLY EVERYTHING . Follow her on twitter @FeLiCiaTaNN

She just her , hahaha . Kidding . Shermaine Lim aka XuanMao , a girl which you can have a haeart to heart talk ! Follow her @SheLim98_Heartz

Ong JiaYi aka JiaMao , Shes crazy about everything . #seriousNOJOKE . Follow her @kiwy_jiayi!

Gary Tan aka CurryEgg . His jokes humor pass , love life complicated . Cannot expose too much . Follow him you will know ! @iCurryy 

Li Shen Soh aka Solutioin , because it rhymes . XD His fats are horribly too much , just joking . His a guy you can hit and his petty . Follow at @Solution_Shen .